…And Their Impact On You Today
It is undeniable that our parents become a critical factor when it comes to our own parenting style. We either look up to them with such admiration and respect or detest them and vow NOT to be like them when we become parents.
You might know a narcissistic parent and not realize it.
Here are the common signs:
They live through their child.
Most parents want their children to succeed and lead a fulfilling life. Therefore, they will do their best to give them everything in life to ensure their child stays on the right path. Their path. Narcissistic parents tend to overdo protecting their children because they want them to succeed NOT as individuals but as their own. They want their child to have the same dreams and goals as that and accomplish the things they cannot.
They lack empathy.
Because narcissists are so self-absorbed, they lack empathy and compassion. They are unwilling to recognize or identify with the feelings and needs of others. Instead, they tend to think they are better or more important than others and that only their interests and opinions matter.
They are manipulative and controlling.
Narcissistic parents want to be in charge of every decision their child makes. Since they cannot take responsibility and communicate healthily, they do so by using guilt trips. They violate boundaries by controlling every aspect of their child’s life. Common examples of narcissistic parenting manipulation include:
Guilt trip: “I’ve done everything for you, and you are so ungrateful.”
Blame: “It’s your fault that I’m not happy.”
Shame: “Your poor performance is an embarrassment to the family.”
Unfavourable comparison: “Why can’t you be as good as your brother?”
Unreasonable pressure: “You will do your best to make me proud.”
Manipulative reward and punishment: “If you do not pursue the college major I chose for you, I will cut off my support.”
Emotional coercion: “You’re not a good daughter/son unless you measure up to my expectations.”
They are manipulative and controlling.
Narcissistic parents want to be in charge of every decision their child makes. Since they cannot take responsibility and communicate healthily, they do so by using guilt trips. They violate boundaries by controlling every aspect of their child’s life. Common examples of narcissistic parenting manipulation include:
Guilt trip: “I’ve done everything for you, and you are so ungrateful.”
Blame: “It’s your fault that I’m not happy.”
Shame: “Your poor performance is an embarrassment to the family.”
Unfavourable comparison: “Why can’t you be as good as your brother?”
Unreasonable pressure: “You will do your best to make me proud.”
Manipulative reward and punishment: “If you do not pursue the college major I chose for you, I will cut off my support.”
Emotional coercion: “You’re not a good daughter/son unless you measure up to my expectations.”
They play obvious favorites with their children.
One specific sign of narcissistic parents is how they play favorites and pit their children against each other. If they have more than one child, they will establish the roles of the golden child or the black sheep with their children. In addition, the narcissistic parent will create a division between their children with lies and evident unfair and favoring behavior.
Narcissistic parents do NOT take responsibility or apologize.
No matter what they have done, narcissists will not genuinely apologize. Instead, they will deny, deflect, and lie to avoid accountability. As a result, they evade responsibility for their own missteps and blame their children.
Do You Have a Narcissistic Parent?
You might find yourself relating to any of the traits above. Dealing with such treatment from a parent is exhausting and can lead to depression and low self-esteem.
Once you know your parent’s personality, the next step is to remind yourself that you’re not always the one to blame. Your relationship with a narcissistic parent may feel customary to you because that is what you grew up with or are currently in the process of growing up with. But it is essential to know that you are not alone. It will help if you try to surround yourself with people you can have in your corner. You can still live the best life by believing in yourself and cultivating your own support system.
Are you Struggling with the effects of a Narcissistic Parent?
Reach out to meet with me personally, for a 90-minute Life & Love Transformation session. Let’s get to the root of the issues and discuss the solutions to starting your Healing Journey to Creating the Life You Desire & Having the Love You Deserve!
Get details here – https://RianaMilne.com/session.