Reflect on Your Past Year with Gratitude and Positivity!
Posted by Pineapple Newspaper; December 01, 2015: Delray Beach & Boca Raton, FL
By Riana Milne; The Pineapple Contributing Writer; column: My Relationship Coach
As December arrives and another year is almost gone, it’s important to look back at the year you experienced with gratitude and a positive mind-set for the lessons you have learned, and the people you have met. Think of the many blessings you have received, and look to live in 2016 with greater wisdom. Every new day is a miracle and your chance to make a difference, no matter how small, in someone else’s life – including your own. If you live with purposeful Gratitude, each day will be meaningful to you.
Studies show that 95% of people have negative over positive thoughts 8 out of 10 times. Obsessive, negative and punishing thoughts begin when you’re a child. A baby is born perfect and open to all of life’s experiences. However, as a young child, they hear a lot of “No’s” which only grow into statements of “that’s bad,” or “you’re bad, or wrong” that come from parents and teachers. Having positive self-talk (those thoughts that are quietly going on inside your head that no one else knows about) can be learned and life altering; becoming a habit that can transform you completely.
Parents who do not realize the importance of using a positive, teaching approach to discipline, may even escalate to verbally and emotionally abusing or hitting their child or teen. This young person then grows into a negative thinking adult with low selfconfidence and feelings of “I’m not good enough.” If you tell your teen he is a looser, he will become one. It is important you teach, as well as model, proper behavior to your child as they age. If you tell your children they are smart and beautiful, they will feel that way as an adult, and accomplish much in life.
Find things to praise your child about when they succeed at a task, or do something nice. When they make a mistake (which is to be expected, they are not supposed to “know better”); then use this as a teaching moment. Ask them to come up with solutions to the problem, and how they should make amends to someone they have hurt. This teaches them Life Skills and creative thinking; a critical skill for success as an adult. You can learn more about Positive Parenting techniques in my book, LIVE Beyond Your Dreams; from Fear and Doubt to Personal Power, Purpose and Success. Make it a new goal in 2016 to parent in a positive, proactive, instructional way that helps your child grow into a positive, smart adult.
When difficult challenges come, learn to look at them in a different way, and say to yourself, “What am I to learn from this?” Instead of saying, “Why me?!” say to yourself, “Why not me?” Changing your thought system takes about 30 days, if you consciously practice daily. Mediation for 15 minutes or use of prayer is a part of it, as is professional Life coaching to make sure you understand how to have a positive mind-set. As adults, we are overcoming a lot of negative programming, but it can be done! My new TV show, Lessons in Life & Love, airing on Tuesdays, 7:30 pm starting January 5th on WRPBiTV; will bring to light many of these educational concepts for success in love, life and relationships, as well as how to feel positive and grateful about your overall Life every day.
In Love Relationships, we bring negative childhood triggers or schemes into our communication and behavior patterns with our partner. Those who get angry easily, are moody, passive-aggressive, controlling or jealous – these are just a few examples of behaviors coming from destructive childhood experiences. In my #1 Best Selling book, LOVE Beyond Your Dreams – Break Free of Toxic Relationships to Have the Love You Deserve, it describes the 22 personality types and behavior patterns that ruin marriages and exclusive relationships. Once you both understand these toxic patterns that may be coming from you and/or your partner, and then learn exactly what to do to change them, the relationship can be totally transformed into the way you both dreamed it should be. Along with your Relationship Coach, it takes two people willing to change destructive dynamics and start living life in a new positive way, making conscious choices that’s best for themselves, and the couple or family “as a team.”
By starting each day with gratitude and monitoring your thoughts and actions to be only positive, and for the good of all, watch what happens to your life and relationships within two months! You’ll be ready to have a fabulous New Year, with a confident, optimistic and inspirational mindset that is based in Love and Gratitude for everything you DO have!