A healthy and “evolved relationship” should contain the following qualities: (please note that “She” could be replaced with “He” for my women readers)
1) She should be a place of unconditional love for me – no matter what I struggle with; she is my partner, friend and confidant. I can count on her to turn to in tough times without ridicule or fear.
2) She should be my best friend, a buddy – someone to laugh with, cry with, dream with and get some honest feedback from, to help me with my decision-making and personal growth.
3) She always offers an opinion because she cares; but ultimately, lets me make the choices I need to make for myself. We both realize I am responsible for my own growth and strength, and my own choices.
4) She needs me for love and friendship, but she isn’t needy. She is strong in her own right, yet turns to me as her man. She respects and honors me, and I her. We are true soul mates. I feel loved as a man should, it makes me feel powerful and strong, but I never look to overpower her or control her.
5) I am attracted to her physically and I desire her, and she me. I crave her; however, this relationship is NOT based on lust or sex, but rather it is “the dessert to the great meal of togetherness.”
6) She is spiritual; we share similar beliefs in spiritual or religious faith and the importance it plays in our lives. Although we may be of similar but different faiths, we also have a respect and openness to other people’s spiritual practice.
7) She is kind – really, really kind. She is a pleasure to be around. She is not rude, negative, or mean- spirited towards others.
8) She is able to communicate her feelings well – whether good or bad – whether we agree or disagree, we are entitled to our separate beliefs, but she never makes me feel small for having different thoughts than her on any subject. We can easily agree to disagree.
9) She is socially confident and outgoing. People like her as much as I do; but she is her own person, and doesn’t falter to the strength of a crowd. I am proud of her individuality, as she is of mine, and I am always proud to be with her.
10) She is as fabulous a mother to her children, as I am a father to mine. There is true unconditional love and friendship with her children.
11) I love her energy; she is generally positive, rarely angry, and she shines her inner light into the hearts of others. She has great mood management, and is patient. (“Love is patient and kind” – Corinthians). She realizes her gift is to help people, and this is her Higher Purpose she strives to meet. She is a GOOD person, and I know it as others do.
12) She is of good moral character and I trust her. She has had challenges throughout her life that did not break her, which makes her even stronger in faith and character. I admire her values, and she lives what she speaks. She is a living example of her word. She is never afraid to tell me the truth, as she lives in the truth.
13) She is intelligent, and uses this wisely, in a way to serve others and to succeed in life.
14) I have great passion for her as a lover and a friend. I feel excited to be near her, look forward to the next time I see her, and know my life would be empty without her. She is beautiful inside and out, and I feel blessed to have her in my life. I would feel truly empty without her.
Remember, the law of Attraction says, “Be what you Want to Attract.” If you can try to be and have all of the above qualities, this is the type of person you will attract to you. Or, it will be evident when someone tries to have a relationship with you who lack these qualities; you will see it quickly and move on.
It takes patience, time and constant self-evaluation to make sure you are the best partner you can be to your spouse. Daily stress takes a toll on the most evolved person, so keeping a spiritual foundation and finding time for personal prayer or mediation is essential. Contact Coach Riana if you need help in decreasing your stress and to help be your personal best self!