Tips for a More Passionate Sex Life – Riana Milne, LMHC, CAP, Cert Life & Relationship Coach
Now that LOVE month (February) is over, hopefully you have romantically reconnected with your partner over Valentine’s Day weekend. Women were SO EXCITED to go see the Fifty Shades of Grey movie that just came out. I advised men to go with their lady to see what all the excitement is about; then have a conversation afterwards to make some new commitments to a more exciting sex life and to an ongoing, passionate, loving relationship. Women are starving for affection and excitement that most only imagine and seek in romance novels and movies. You can make it happen for real, and when it does, there’s nothing like it!
CNN reported in 2011 that nearly 40 million Americans are stuck in sexless marriages – but you don’t have to be part of this statistic! Of course, if there is built up anger and resentment in your relationship, along with a lot of time between intimate encounters, now is the time to get help from your Relationship Coach to rekindle that spark you used to have and create the fiery passionate relationship you always dreamed of. You CAN have Love Beyond Your Dreams!
Below are just a few tips to get started in having a better quality, passionate sexual relationship:
- Couples need to equally take care of the household chores. No excuses! Since both couples work in most households, this responsibility must equally be shared. If it falls on one partner, they will become angry and resentful. Many studies show that when men pitch in equally, they get rewarded more in the bedroom, as their ladies are not so tired. Also, when the woman picks up after a man, she sees him as a child – not her man. This begins a spiral of lower passion and a loss of libido and respect. Studies confirm that stress kills female sexual desire neurologically because sexual feelings begin in the brain for women. To feel sexual, anxiety and stress need to be low, so if she is worrying about her “to do” list and the chores that aren’t done, she won’t have the feelings to engage intimately. Get her out of the house on creative dates to have fun!
- Be creative in the Bedroom – and out of it. The same sexual routine is boring for both men and women. Be daring enough to experiment and take sex out of the bedroom to other places within the home and in nature. Use fantasy, role play and other activities that engage all the senses of pleasure – smell, touch, taste, sight and sound. Create a romantic, clutter-free bedroom that encourages intimacy with luxurious bedding, candles, music and scent. Men are turned on visually first, so women, dress alluring. It’s ok to sometimes want “soft love” – a sexual connection that is tender and loving if you are more tired. Once a week have fantasy sex – that is “on the edge” of fantasy. Sexual variety on a regular basis keeps a loving, passionate connection.
- Turn off all gadgets and electronic devices once you are home. Couples are losing their relationship to technology. Stop using computers and phones the minute you get home, and engage with your partner and family. Social media is especially consuming couple time; and the use of technology has increased sexual addictions and emotional affairs. Your time, energy and attention should be on your partner, making them a priority. Engage in quality conversations and give each other time for intimacy, especially on the weekends.
- What you do and say on a daily basis is the foundation of a great sex life. How do you relate to your partner on a daily basis? Are you loving, kind, supportive and generous? Does your positive thoughts and behavior really outweigh the negative emotional interactions? Do you reach out by text to say something sweet or sexy for no reason, give surprise gifts, and greet your partner at the door to make them feel important? The quality of your sex life is directly related to how you treat each other daily! If you are negative, criticize, complain or are moody and angry, you will repel your partner. The positive interactions should be 6 to 1 over the negative interactions. Be sure to consciously monitor what you do and say to your partner on a daily basis. If you have a negative mind-set, get help now to fix it for good!
- Don’t fake it in the bedroom. Many women and men are faking their orgasms, which can mean there are underlying issues, either emotionally or physically (low energy, decreased libido or ED problems) that need to be talked about in a loving, supportive way. Let your Relationship Coach help you find a solution to rebuild your confidence and passion for each other like it’s never been before!
Remember life is a joy trip! But are you just living life – or living the life you LOVE? Now is the time to start. Grab your partner and go have some passionate fun this weekend!
Riana Mine, MA, LMHC, CAP is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor and Cert. Addictions Professional at Therapy by the Sea; 15300 Jog Rd, Suite 109, Delray Beach. Also a Certified, world-wide Relationship, Love & Life Coach, published author, and motivational speaker, her free App: My Relationship Coach offers more articles and her books, LIVE Beyond Your Dreams – from Fear and Doubt to Personal Power, Purpose and Success, and LOVE Beyond Your Dreams – Break Free of Toxic Relationships to Have the Love You Deserve addresses relationships with yourself and others. To learn more or suggest a topic, go to Riana’s website, www.RianaMilne.com or email RianaMilne@gmail.com. Skype Coaching and FB: coachrianamilne. Office ph: (561) 701-8277; worldwide cell: (201) 281-7887 #RelationshipCoach, #LoveCoach, #LifeCoach, #SinglesCoach